starstruckastrology:

Aries: “It was a lightning bolt of an idea in Flavortown that pranked the un-prankable mayor, Guy Fieri.”

Taurus: “They make a porchetta that you won’t forgetta.”

Gemini: “[Those] fried green tomatoes, brother that’s a symposium of flavor.”

Cancer: “She could feed me beef six ways to Sunday.”

Leo: “Shut the front door, son of Tatum O’Neal, that’s dynamite.”

Virgo: “People who like haggis call it spicy, creamy, rich, and buttery — I don’t wanna tell you what I call it”

Libra: “This patio goes off the hook — I think the folks are in a Flavortown food coma.”

Scorpio: “The Parmageddon has pierogi, kraut, and sharp cheddar, and then it goes into the meltification machine — it’s outta bounds and so much more than a grilled cheese sandwich.”

Sagittarius: “Chef Matt says, ‘Get jiggy with it, have some fun!‘”

Capricorn: “I lay claim to the knuckle sandwich… it’s my brand, my logo, hell, even my tattoo, so when I find out that two dudes in Austin have opened up a sandwich joint and one of their menu items is the knuckle sandwich, I tell you what, they’d better deliver the real deal. (jk.)”

Aquarius:“I don’t know if it’s fair to call their Russian dressing Russian dressing — it should be called something sexy, like liquid Moscow.”

Pisces:  “His seafood is so fresh it’ll slap ya.”